Tops and Bottoms

You’re probably thinking, based on the title, that this might be about fashion and advice on style.  Since I know I don’t have a great sense of style I would be the last person to write about anything to do with fashion.  I have no clue what season or color palate I am except I know I like jeans and loose-fitting shirts.

My title might lead you to think this could be about boobs and butts.

I don’t often think about boobs and butts, but (no pun intended) since it’s been mentioned, as far as boobs go, well, I do have two aging ones.   Speaking for myself and from what I’ve heard my sisters mention, it would appear that aging boobs are like birds in winter…..they tend to head south.  Nope, this isn’t about boobs and butts.

Believe it or not this is about my youngest grandson.

He’s a very considerate 3 year-old when it comes to using the toilet.  He always puts the seat down when he’s finished.  He also puts the lid down but I’ve learned that’s not out of consideration but for his own purpose.

He uses the toilet lid as his work bench so he can set the bathroom soap dispenser on top.  Each and every time he uses the toilet.

I think placing the soap dispenser on the toilet lid gives him better leverage for a stronger pumping action.  He’ll fill his hand with soap to the point the soap sometimes runs out of his hands and onto the toilet lid.  I’ve explained that he only needs a little bit of soap to wash his hands, however he believes more is better.  After filling his hand with soap he goes to the sink where he’ll rub his palms together under cold water.  A quick pat of his hands on the towel then he comes to me with hands that are still wet and soapy.

The first time this happened I took him back to the bathroom and showed him how to properly wash his hands.

I pumped a dime size amount of soap onto the palm of his hand, then showed him how to wash his hands.  I held his hands under warm running water, rubbing his palms together then showing him how to wash the tops bottoms of his hands  by rubbing the palm of one hand on top of the other hand.

We have a routine now.

I’ll give him a few minutes to do his business then ask through the closed bathroom door if he’s done.   He’ll yell “no” which means he’s got the soap dispenser on the lid of the toilet.  That’s my cue, so I knock on the door before going into the bathroom.

“I’m get’in soap” he’ll say, standing by the toilet while pumping soap into his hands and onto the toilet lid.  Adjusting the water in the sink I’ll wag my finger at him in a “come here” motion.  With a last look at the soap dispenser, he walks to the sink and immediately starts washing his hands while always saying something about why he put the soap on the toilet lid.  I don’t say anything about the soap, just remind him “tops and bottoms”  while he washes his hands and then help him dry his hands on the towel.

The soap dispenser goes back on the sink until next time and I wipe the soap off the toilet lid if necessary.  My toilet lid is always very clean by the way.

I once forgot to wipe the soap off the toilet lid after he had been in the bathroom.  When I sat on the toilet lid to clean the cat’s litter box my butt slid a bit on the lid.  White soap on a white lid can be easy to miss if you forget.

I guess a butt did play a small part in this tale after all, however, here’s where the idea and title for this story came from.  A simple comment by a three-year-old little boy,  nothing profound or news worthy, but it made me laugh.

The other day I was standing at the bathroom sink, with the door open, washing my hands after cleaning the cat’s litter box.  The little guy walks by, sees what I’m doing, and pauses to look at me. “Tops and bottoms Grandma” he says with a serious look, then continued on his way.

I’ll take that as proof that males do listen to the women in their lives.  Sometimes.


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